How Do I Find a Good Real Estate Agent? A Realtor's Honest Guide

If you're reading this, you're probably thinking about buying or selling a home, and you've already realized something important. The house isn't the hardest part. Finding the right person to guide you through it is.

The internet will tell you to read reviews, ask friends for referrals, and interview a few agents. That advice isn't wrong. It's just incomplete. It misses the bigger point.

A good real estate agent helps you buy or sell a house. A great real estate agent helps you make the right decision about the next chapter of your life. Those are two very different jobs.

My name is Carmen Salerno. I'm a Realtor with Compass serving Melrose Park and the Chicago West Suburbs, and I've worked with first-time buyers, growing families, retirees moving across the country, investors, and sellers who've lived in their homes for nearly two decades. After all those transactions, I've learned something most real estate articles never talk about. The people who are happiest after closing aren't the ones who got the lowest interest rate or squeezed the last $500 out of the deal. They're the ones who made the right decision.

That's why I think most people are asking the wrong question. Instead of "who is the best real estate agent," they should be asking, "how do I find an agent whose judgment I trust?"

Because when the inspection goes sideways, when the appraisal comes in low, when the buyer gets nervous, when the seller changes their mind, when the closing is three days away and a problem appears out of nowhere, that's when you find out what kind of agent you hired. The signs, the marketing, the social media followers, and the polished presentations don't matter much at that point. Judgment does.

Here's everything I'd tell my own family if they were hiring an agent tomorrow.

The 3 Biggest Mistakes People Make When Choosing a Real Estate Agent

Mistake #1: Hiring a Friend or Family Member Just Because They're Licensed

I had someone very close to me, basically family, list his home with another family member instead of me. At first, I'll admit, I was disappointed. But what happened next taught me something.

Throughout the entire transaction, he kept calling me with questions. Questions about pricing, strategy, contracts, what he should do next. I could have told him to call his own agent. I could have reminded him that he hired someone else. Instead, I helped him every time, because that's what you do for people you care about.

But here's the lesson. He hired one agent and trusted another. That's the danger of hiring family or friends simply because they're licensed. The relationship makes it easier to hire them. It also makes it harder to fire them when they're not performing.

Before hiring a friend or relative, ask yourself one question: would I hire this person if we weren't related? If the honest answer is no, don't do it.

Mistake #2: Hiring the Agent Who Promises the Highest Price

This happens all the time. Three agents sit at a kitchen table. Two say the house is worth $385,000 based on real comps. The third says it's worth $425,000. Guess who gets hired? Almost always the agent with the highest number.

The problem is that pricing a home isn't about making the seller feel good. It's about creating demand. The first two weeks on the market are the most important weeks your home will ever have. Buyers are watching. Other agents are watching. Everyone is paying attention to what's new.

If a home is overpriced, those critical first weeks disappear. Then come the price reductions. Then come the questions. Then buyers start wondering what's wrong with the property. I've seen sellers lose tens of thousands of dollars because they hired the agent who gave them the answer they wanted instead of the answer they needed.

The best agents don't tell you the highest number. They tell you the truth.

Mistake #3: Buyers Using the Listing Agent on the House They Want

This one surprises people. A buyer drives past a house, sees a sign, calls the number, and now they're "working with" the listing agent. The problem? That agent represents the seller. Their job is to get the seller the highest price and best terms possible. That doesn't make them a bad person. It just means they're not your advocate.

You wouldn't hire your opponent's attorney in court. Yet buyers do the real estate version of that every weekend. Having your own representation changes everything. You need someone whose only job is to protect your interests, negotiate for your goals, and tell you honestly when a house isn't right for you.

A Real Story: When I Stopped a First-Time Buyer From Making the Wrong Move

A first-time buyer came to me already in the middle of her home search with another agent. The problem was, her agent kept showing her homes at $400,000 and up. She could technically afford that on paper, but it wasn't what she wanted for her first home. She wanted something more comfortable, more manageable, something that felt like a starting point, not a stretch.

Her agent wasn't listening. He was showing her what he thought she should buy, not what she actually wanted.

Here's what I noticed that her first agent missed. Just because a lender approves you for $400K doesn't mean you should spend $400K, especially on your first home. A lot of agents see the pre-approval number and treat it like a target. I treat it like a ceiling, and the real conversation is about where inside that ceiling the client actually feels good.

I started over with her. I sat down and asked what she actually wanted, not what she could qualify for. We reset the search to her real comfort zone, and I catered every showing to her criteria. We found her home in a few weeks, and when she left her review, she called switching agents "the best decision in the home buying process."

That's the line that matters. Not because she was praising me, but because of what it says about the alternative. She was about to buy the wrong house from someone who wasn't listening.

What People Are Really Thanking Me For

Here's something I noticed when I sat down and read through years of client reviews.

The words clients use to describe me aren't the words I'd expect. They're not "expert negotiator" or "market authority" or "top producer." They're words like calm. Patient. No pressure. Made me feel comfortable. Took good care of me. One retired client called me "an angel sent by god." Another said I made "an intimidating objective a very exciting and fulfilling experience."

Notice what's underneath all of that. It's not about the house. It's about how they felt while we were finding it, selling it, or saving it.

What I think people are actually thanking me for is this: I take something that's supposed to be terrifying, the biggest financial decision most people will ever make, and I make it feel okay. Not by sugarcoating it. Not by being a cheerleader. By being calm when they're not. By being patient when they want to rush. By telling them the truth when other agents would tell them what they want to hear.

That's not a skill you can list on a resume. It's the thing my clients can't quite name, but they feel it. And when their cousin, their coworker, or their best friend is about to go through the same scary thing, they send them to me, because they know I'll make it feel okay for them too.

The Deal That Almost Died Over $1,100

A longtime homeowner in the West Suburbs had lived in his house for 19 years. He was older, retired, and selling to start the next chapter of his life in Texas. Quiet sale, nothing dramatic, the kind of transaction that's supposed to be easy.

We made it all the way to the end. Contract signed, buyer ready, closing on the calendar. Then we hit the village transfer stamp. The municipality required him to clear an outstanding violation ticket before they'd issue the stamp, and without the stamp, you don't close in Illinois. The ticket was $1,100.

He didn't have it. Not because he was being stubborn, but because he was a retired man moving across the country with every dollar already accounted for. $1,100 in disposable cash he didn't have right then.

We were days from closing. The buyer was waiting. If we missed the closing, we risked losing the deal entirely. He'd waited 19 years to make this move. We were about to lose it over $1,100.

So I lent him the money out of my own pocket. That's not something I normally do, and it's not something any rulebook tells you to do. But the alternative was watching a retired man lose his closing, his move, and the easiest chapter he was praying for. The violation got cleared, the village issued the stamp, and we closed on time. He paid me back after closing, made it to Texas, and later wrote in a review that he thought I was "an angel sent by god."

I share this not because I want credit for it, but because it's a glimpse of what good representation actually looks like. The houses are the easy part. The market sells the houses. What you're really hiring an agent for is what they do when the system is about to fail you over $1,100.

The Million-Dollar Listing I Lost By Telling the Truth

I had a listing appointment in Elmhurst for a home around $1 million. The appointment went well. We had a real conversation, I had a strategy ready, and I left thinking we were going to get the listing.

Then she called the next day. Her tone had completely changed. She had one question: had I personally sold at that price point in Elmhurst before?

Here's where the story actually happens. I could have said yes. Most agents probably would have. I've sold in Elmhurst. I've sold homes up to $4 million in other markets. I could have stretched those two facts together into a yes and she'd have had no way to verify it.

But I didn't. I told her the truth. No, I hadn't sold at that exact price point in Elmhurst specifically. I told her what I had sold, where, and at what price points, and I let her make the decision with real information.

She hired someone else.

Here's the part that still sits with me. She never ended up selling the house. Whoever she hired didn't get it done. The trade she thought she was making, hiring someone with the "right" answer to her question, didn't actually produce the outcome she wanted.

Would I do it again? Every single time. Sometimes telling the truth costs you the deal. It never costs you yourself.

How to Find a Great Real Estate Agent Step by Step

If my niece called me tomorrow and said she was moving somewhere I had no contacts, this is exactly what I'd tell her. Step by step.

Step 1: Don't Start With Google. Start With Closed Transactions.

Most people open a search tab and type "best realtor in [city]." Every result on that page paid to be there. Skip it.

Instead, go to Zillow, Redfin, or Realtor.com and search for homes that recently sold in the specific neighborhood you're moving to. Not the city, the neighborhood. Look at the last six months of closed sales. Write down the names of the listing agents on those deals. Those agents are actually doing business where you're moving. They're not paying for a spot on a "best of" list. They're earning it on the MLS.

You want three to five names from that list.

Step 2: Check Their Actual Sales History, Not Their Marketing.

Before you call anyone, look up each agent on Zillow or Redfin and scroll to their sales history. You're looking for two things. How many homes have they personally closed in the last 12 months. And how many of those were in your specific neighborhood or price range. An agent who closed 30 deals last year but only 2 in your area is the wrong agent. An agent who closed 15 deals and 10 were on your block is the right agent. Volume matters less than relevance.

Insider tip: if you already have a relationship with a Compass agent (or an agent at any major brokerage), ask them to look up other agents for you. We have tools inside our platform that pull agent performance data across markets, with real numbers and real transactions, way more accurate than what you'll find on a public site. If you're moving somewhere new, your current agent can do this homework for you in about ten minutes. That's a phone call worth making before you start interviewing.

Step 3: Interview at Least Three Agents. Never Just One.

Hiring the first agent you talk to is like marrying the first person you date. Talk to three. Even if you love the first one, talk to two more, because you don't actually know what good looks like until you've seen mediocre.

Step 4: Ask the Questions Most People Don't.

Skip the standard ones. Every agent has rehearsed answers to "how long have you been in real estate" and "what's your communication style." Ask these instead:

• How many homes have you personally sold in my zip code in the last 12 months?
• What's the last deal you lost, and why?
• If we don't get an offer in the first three weeks, what's your plan? (Or for buyers: if we lose three offers in a row, what changes?)
• Who actually answers my texts, you or someone on your team?
• Can I talk to your last three clients? Not your favorite three, your last three.

If they answer clearly and specifically, that's a real agent. If they get vague, defensive, or pivot to talking about themselves, that's your answer.

Step 5: Watch for These Red Flags.

• The agent who promises the highest list price. They're trying to win your listing, not sell your house.
• The agent who agrees with everything you say. You're hiring judgment, not compliance.
• The agent who talks more than they listen. The first appointment should feel like a conversation about you, not a presentation about them.
• The agent who can't tell you anything specific about your neighborhood. If they can't name the schools, the issues, the recent comps, and what makes the area different, they don't actually work there.
• The agent who pressures you to sign on the spot. A good agent knows they get picked because they're the right fit, not because they cornered you.

Step 6: Trust the Gut Check.

After the third interview, sit down and ask yourself one question. Which of these three would I want in my corner if everything went sideways at the closing table? Not which one I liked the most. Not which one had the nicest website. Which one would I trust if the deal almost died and someone had to figure out how to save it. That's the agent.

Step 7: One Last Test.

Before you sign anything, send them a text. Just a normal question, something you'd reasonably ask. Time how long it takes them to respond, and read what they wrote. If they reply fast and clearly, you have your answer. If they take 36 hours to send a one-line reply, that's the version of them you're going to get for the next 90 days. Believe what they show you now.

The One Thing I Hope You Take Away

If you've made it this far, you don't know me. We've never met. You're probably sitting at your kitchen table, coffee getting cold, thinking about a move you haven't made yet.

So before you close this article and go back to your day, here's the one thing I hope you take with you.

Buying or selling a home is one of the scariest things you'll ever do. Not because of the money, although the money is real. Because of what it actually represents. You're not just signing paperwork on a house. You're making a decision about the next chapter of your life. Where you'll wake up. Where your kids will grow up. Where you'll spend the next 5, 10, or 19 years. It's supposed to feel big. It's supposed to feel scary. Anyone who tells you otherwise is selling you something.

The right agent doesn't make the scary part go away. The right agent stands next to you while you walk through it, tells you the truth even when it costs them the deal, and makes sure that when you get to the other side, you got there for the right reasons, in the right house, at the right number, with your dignity and your savings intact.

That's the whole job. The houses are the easy part. The market sells the houses. What you're really looking for is someone who understands that this isn't a transaction for you, it's a chapter, and treats it that way.

If you find that person, hire them. It doesn't have to be me. It just has to be someone who gets it.

And if you ever want to talk about Melrose Park, the West Suburbs, or whether now is the right time to move, my phone is on. No pitch. No pressure. Just a conversation about what you're actually trying to do with the next chapter of your life.

That's the version of me my clients refer their friends to. And it's the version of me you'd get if you called.

Frequently Asked Questions About Choosing a Real Estate Agent